It is hard for me to open up my life to a total stranger so please read all of this……….

I was born into a Christian family. I lived in the average middle class home as an only child. Every since I can remember I have gone to church and have been told that Jesus loves me and died on the cross to save me from the burden of sin. What I didn't understand was that He died to save me from most of the things I was about to do as an adolescent.

My parents and I argued on a regular basis about getting up on time on Sunday morning to get to church on time. What they didn't know, or what I thought they didn't know, was that I was hung over from the party the night before and that I just got in a few hours ago. They were constantly trying to shove that "religion stuff" down my throat and I was doing the best I could to rebel against it

I used to provoke my dad into fistfights, my mom would stand by watching, and try to figure out what she was doing wrong to create the friction between my dad and I. It was probably to hard for her to admit that her only son was doing wrong. (Sorry mom).

They taught me not to have sex before I was married…..So I lost my virginity when I was 13 years old and would have sex with almost every girlfriend I had. (A lot).

My parents tried their best to teach me that I shouldn't drink alcohol…..so I started drinking when I was about 15 years old and would have contests with my friends to see who could drink the most. I also smoked some occasional pot for good measure.

They taught me to love and to show others respect…so I cared about no one else but myself. Always looked out for #1, me.

They taught me to use common sense…so I got a Yamaha FZR 750 Street bike and would race my roommates doing 140+.

They taught me never to steal or cheat….so by the time I was 19 years old I was the biggest thief I knew. I was a security guard at a local mall and me and another employee figured out a way to steal the stores blind. We had a contest to see who could steal the most. I don't remember who won but I stole over $2,000.00 worth of merchandise.

I was very involved in sports. Especially baseball, I seemed to be better at it than any other sport. So I concentrated on it in hopes that some day I might even be good enough to make it into a career. When I was a junior in High School the Philadelphia Phillies scouted me and I was invited to try out at the Civic Stadium, home of the Phillies farm club. I showed up very nervous but gave it all that I had and did a good job. The head scout pulled me aside at the end of the day and told me that he was impressed with my pitching ability but that he couldn't use me until I graduated from High School. He told me to return next year as a senior and try out again. My senior year I tore nearly every tendon in my elbow throwing a curve ball. I was done playing baseball.

It seemed as if my life where in an uncontrollable downward spiral. I felt desperate and was constantly looking for something new to satisfy me…. I could never seem to find it. Stealing, cheating, lying, losing myself in relationships with girls, spending all of my free time practicing baseball…none of these things ever made me feel better.

In the world's eyes I was a cool guy and was popular, but in God's eyes there were tears and I didn't even know it.

I have decided to open my life up for you to read on the Internet for one reason. I am hoping that some of these things will ring a bell with you and you will continue reading this story because the best part is coming up.

Remember how I was trying so desperately to find something else to satisfy…….I want you to know that I found It! The funny thing is that I didn't have to look very far because "it", or should I say "HE" was with me the entire time.

You see, in my stubbornness to ignore my parents, I was concentrating on the "it"…….not the "HE"

The HE that I am talking about is my best friend, JESUS CHRIST.

On April 7th, 1992, while I was working a graveyard shift, I was suddenly overcome with grief and I began to think about everything that I was a failure at. It seemed that everything I tried I had failed at and it had finally caught up with me. I needed help! This "little voice" told me to reflect back to the very beginning of all my problems. The first thing that came to my mind was that my parents where right the whole time.

I called my dad at home and talked to him for over an hour about all of the things that were going through my mind and I told him how desperate I felt and that everything that I tried I failed at on my own. It seemed like I needed help. My dad shared Jeremiah 29:11 from the bible with me:

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans for you to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Wow! God had a plan for me all of these years and I never let him help me. I thought I could do it all on my own.

My dad then told me the only way that I could prosper in life was to include JESUS CHRIST in all that I do and stop trying to do it all on my own. I knew what I had to do. I knew from the very beginning.

With tears in my eyes I fell to my knees, right there at work, and my dad prayed with me on the phone.

My prayer sounded something like this:

"Jesus, I need you in my life. I know that you died on the cross for me so that I could be forgiven for all of the stupid decisions that I make. I ask you right now to forgive me. I know I can't find true happiness without including you in my life. Please come into my life and help me take control. Amen."

After the last words in my prayer it felt like a huge weight was lifted off me, BIG TIME. (Thanks dad).

I have been blessed with a beautiful wife, Katrina. Two great kids, Kelsey and Riley and I have a new best friend that will forgive and forget, JESUS CHRIST.

Sometimes life still throws me a "curve ball" but I have the Lord on deck waiting to bat me in. The cool thing is that he hits a home run every time, and I'm never left on base by myself again.

That to me is success.

Thank you for finishing the story.


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